The Do’s and Don’ts: Business Etiquette Dining for Interviews

Let’s establish something right now. Dining out with a prospective employer is not the same as your everyday casual dining experience. I know that this is common sense, but you’d be amazed at the number of people who don’t realize this once they’re sitting in their seat and staring at the mouth watering menu.

It’s about the experience, not the food.

So the mentality going in is that you are there for business. You’re allowed to walk out hungry or unsatisfied with the food. The point is, how do you react in social settings?

The following tips and pointers are from the NYU Wasserman’s “Dining for Success” event that I attended.

What to do about food restrictions:

• If you’re vegetarian, it’s often awkward to indicate to the server that you can’t eat meat especially since in most situations, the menu is preset (this occurs when dining in large groups). The best way to avoid this conflict is speaking to the secretary or the person who is organizing the event ahead of time. Contact HR to let them know of any dietary, allergy, or meat restrictions that you have.
• If you are allergic to anything- especially herbs, nuts, or other commonly found ingredients that can sneak their way into your plate-  this is the time to speak up when giving your order to the server. The last thing you want is having your potential employer stick a Epipen into you.
• If you’re just a picky eater and don’t want to eat a certain something that’s in your entree, suck it up. Don’t ask for modifications and diverge from the menu if you can avoid it. You don’t want to give off the impression that you’re  picky and choosy because what does that say about your work ethic? Will you be picky and choosy when it comes to projects. Remember, it’s not about the food.

What about alcohol?:

• Generally, don’t order it. Period.
• If your host insists on you ordering alcohol or if everyone else is ordering it, stick to 1 drink, 2 max.
• So scenario. Let’s say that the server goes around the table starting with the host, but you can’t hear anyone’s drink order. Ask for water, soda, juice. Stay away from the alcohol.

Positioning of forks, knives, drinks- what do you use first?!:

• Hold out your hands in front of you and pinch your index finger with your thumb to make a “b” and a “d” with your left and right fingers, respectively. “b” for bread plate on your left side and “d” for drink. Easy as pie.
• The table will always be set for you. Just remember that the fork is on your left (fork is four letters and so is left) and the knife/spoon are on your right (knife and spoon are five letters each and so is right). Work your way from the outside to the inside.
• When you arrive to the table, take the napkin off the table and put it on your lap (I keep it folded once neatly on my lap). If you need to use the restroom, the napkin goes on your chair, not the table.

When to Eat?!:

• A no brainer. Wait for the host or the recruiter to start. Do not lift a single fork until the host indicates that he/she is ready to start.

Conversations and Topics:

• Talk about sports (?): This is a tricky one. Even in NYC, you don’t want to say, “I’m a huge Yankees fan. It’s only a matter of time before they win the ALCS and advance onto the World Series.” Someone at my table alluded to that and what do you know. The recruiter who was dining with us was from Boston and was a huge Red Sox fan. So in cases like this, it’d be more prudent to saying something along the lines of “Anyone here a baseball fan and catch the game last night?” Sometimes it’s better to stick to neutral statements until you get a vibe from the other people at the table. That being said, if you’re going for a position that demands you to be somewhat outspoken, you wouldn’t want to take this approach. So it’s all about gauging.
• Wait for the host to talk: Luckily, the host will usually direct the conversation, so the above point may not even be necessary. Just remember that you want to seem sociable, but not dominating.

Leftover food?:

• I know that this is such a waste, but don’t doggy bag. First, it’s awkward to do so and second, imagine standing up after the dinner and speaking with your prospective employer and having to hold a doggy bag in your hands. Awkward indeed.

Things you may not remember when you’re sitting in front of the food (but are still common sense!)…:

• Don’t order anything that splashes- like pasta.
• If you have skewers, take the meat off with your utensils and cut the meat. Don’t bite directly into the skewer using your hands.
• You’re actually supposed to wait for the salad to come out before you start eating from the bread basket. But this is old school etiquette, so follow the host.
• Don’t slurp your soup… or your drink for that matter.

Take everything on here wit a grain of thought. Things change depending on the situation so keep an open mind.

You should also check out:

• What not to do when grilling bacon wrapped asparagus

Tagged as: etiquette dining